The Universe and Me

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Together for the first time

One morning last week my stapler became hopelessly jammed. Not what I was wanting when I had to staple together 24 invoices. And it's a little embarrassing having coworkers see one trying to fish out the stuck staples with an unbent paperclip. Honestly, those little buggers (the staples, not the coworkers!) took me about 20 minutes to free. The previous week I had to figure out how to reload staples in an electronic stapler. Open the visor, that was easy. Next step took me several Google searches to find and the next step was: unlock the cartridge. Nowhere did the internet tell me HOW to unlock the cartridge. I finally figured out to press down very hard (breaking a fingernail in the process) on a teeny blue button which apparently was the cartridge lock.

So for a couple weeks it seemed staples and/or staplers were out to get me. If only someone would invent a staple-free stapler. Oh wait, someone has!

There's a new handy device that cuts a little flap in the corner of your papers, folds those flaps back and tucks them into a tiny slit. It can clip together up to five sheets at once. It's safe for all ages and supposedly maintenance free. Prices start at six dollars. Government offices in Japan almost all use these devices exclusively. The current market for these is about 30% more than traditional staplers.

Thursday, March 20, 2014

If I could save time in a fish tank

"An oasis of calm in your hectic cube."

On my work desk I have my computer and assorted dull things like: stapler, calendar, hand lotion, tape dispenser and paper clips. It would be very cool to add this for life, color and even functionality. I'd probably end up watching the fish swim around far too much, though, since there's something hypnotizing about that.

For around forty dollars, you can buy this beauty. It's powered entirely by your computer's USB power. Plays soothing nature sounds. I suppose not everyone considers all nature sounds soothing. Frogs and birds are very well outside, but I don't know about indoors and the sound of running water would probably make me have to use the ladies room more often. It contains a multifunctional pen holder, multicolor interior lights, under-gravel filtration system, low voltage pump, LCD calendar with time and date plus the temperature, alarm clock and countdown timer (hopefully not countdown to when you're fired for watching your fish too much.)